Originally posted by telerionI'm glad to hear that a parent will actually be a parent
I will teach my daughter why I think abstinence is a wise choice through the junior high/high school years.
(i.e., responsible). If all parents took this approach,
there would be no need for sex education.
I assume that you will teach her that abstinence is the
wisest and safest choice, but also teach her about contraception,
in the event she decides to exercise less than perfect judgement,
as many teenagers do.
I ask because you didn't make mention of that unless 'be in control
of her reproductive cycle' means contraception.
Nemesio
Originally posted by telerion
How does having a child decrease the risk of getting pregnant a second time while using contraception?
Heck, I've no idea what I was trying to say! I think what I was getting at is that people really don't realise how much of a responsibility children are. Once you have a child and you realise this (and assuming you are against all forms of abortion), you may be more carefull about sex, simply as you really don't want to have another child.
I guess I was hinting at hindsight. Even with a steady income, a paid for house and help in the form of in-laws close by, it still is alot of work bringing up a kid. I can just can't imagine the pressures and stress one has to endure bringing up a child at 16.
Originally posted by pcaspianBaby-rearing is a 24/7 job and pretty much ends a 16 year-old's carefree years, which is why it is important to councel them in *all* ways of birth control, abstinence and condoms included.
Originally posted by telerion
[b]
How does having a child decrease the risk of getting pregnant a second time while using contraception?
Heck, I've no idea what I was trying to say! I think what I was getting at is that people really don't realise how much of a responsibility children are. Once you have a child and you realise this (and a ...[text shortened]... can just can't imagine the pressures and stress one has to endure bringing up a child at 16.
[/b]
Originally posted by nemesioI will see to it that she knows about different forms of contraception and how to use them. Most importantly, I will make sure that she knows how her female body functions. I was the first person in my wife's life to recommend that she see a gynecologist. I was stunned that as a man I knew more about her body than she did. Her mother just thought those things were should not be spoken of and figured it didn't matter since her daughter wasn't going to have sex anyway.
I'm glad to hear that a parent will actually be a parent
(i.e., responsible). If all parents took this approach,
there would be no need for sex education.
I assume that you will teach her that abstinence is the
wisest and safest choice, but also teach her about contraception,
in the event she decides to exercise less than perfect judgement,
as man ...[text shortened]... tion of that unless 'be in control
of her reproductive cycle' means contraception.
Nemesio
Originally posted by KneverKnight
Baby-rearing is a 24/7 job and pretty much ends a 16 year-old's carefree years, which is why it is important to councel them in *all* ways of birth control, abstinence and condoms included.
A common problem in Kenya.. and recently addressed by Nobal Laureate, Wangari Maathai, is HIV amoungst woman. The problem is that men cheat on their girlfriends/wifes and using a condom everytime you have sex with your monogamous partner tends to be 'unrealistic'. The Pill is intended to be pretty failsafe, yet that does not stop the spead of HIV when your husband contracts the virus from a prostitute.
I believe every teenager should contemplate the following questions before they even consider using contraceptives :
1. Are you willing to abort your foetus should you realise you have fallen pregnant ?
2. Do you realise contraceptives (even if used properly) are not a guarantee you will not get pregnant ?
3. Do you know that 1 in 5 adults in the USA have a STD ?
4. The Pill makes you gain weight.
Should they answer 'no' to the first question, they should be given a practical lesson in caring for a child for atleast 1 week full time, because it is a very likely possibility.
They should also know the following:
http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/publications/factsheet/fscondom.htm
With typical use, 14 percent of women relying only on the male condom, and 21 percent relying only on the female condom, will experience unintended pregnancy within one year. With perfect use (meaning couples make no errors in the way they use the condoms and also use condoms consistently at every act of sexual intercourse), only five percent of women relying on the male condom, and three percent on the female condom, will experience unintended pregnancy within one year.5
By comparison, 85 percent of women relying on no method of contraception will experience pregnancy within one year.5
Ofcourse the theory behind using condoms are one thing, in practise it is another. Alchohol, the social lubricant, really doesn't help in the quest of preventing STD's or birth control.
At the end of the day it is their choice and true, they can only make an informed decision if they know all the facts. But they should also be carefull, in the car/birth control analogy the safety belt is not failsafe, not even 99% safe.
Originally posted by pcaspianIs that so?? That's pretty frightening.
3. Do you know that 1 in 5 adults in the USA have a STD ?
While I'm mostly in agreement with you, I think that these lessons should be taught even before the teenage years. In my hometown, in rural Ontario, our high school ran from Grade 7 (when I was 12) to Grade 13 (apart from the usual Grade 9 to Grade 13). We were exposed to a LOT of high-school-ish things at a very early age. In my Grade 7 year, I know, personally, 4 girls who became pregnant and one had an abortion. The other 3 dropped out of school that summer. The ONLY sex education we were given by that time was all anatomy - there were no discussion on the risks of pregnanacy, STDs, etc. Although, who knows if that would've even changed anything anyway...
Anyways, just a thought.
I was going to try to be witty re: 'I abstain from abstinence' but I actually thought about this topic and realised that I feel my early teenaged years were awesome and uncomplicated or stressful because I DID practice abstinence,it seemed like a good choice at the time but it was hard to do with so much opportunity and temptation!
Originally posted by TinorangatiratangaI had to abstain from sex during my early teenage years as well.
I was going to try to be witty re: 'I abstain from abstinence' but I actually thought about this topic and realised that I feel my early teenaged years were awesome and uncomplicated or stressful because I DID practice abstinence,it seemed like a good choice at the time but it was hard to do with so much opportunity and temptation!
It wasn't by bloody choice though! I had a face like a pizza, smelled like a tramp and dressed like a gothic corpse.
Nowadays, thanks to pathetic school taking FOREVER, ppl do not get married until around 30 years old. So, I ask the pro-abstenance crowd, are you willing to wait that long? Back in your day 50 years ago, did ANYONE wait that long? 😀 It's kinda stupid to ask a guy/girl to hold off sex when biologicly speaking god allows them to have babies for up to 10-20 years before they get married and they are in their mating prime. . .
Originally posted by mateulose
Nowadays, thanks to pathetic school taking FOREVER, ppl do not get married until around 30 years old. So, I ask the pro-abstenance crowd, are you willing to wait that long? Back in your day 50 years ago, did ANYONE wait that long? 😀 It's kinda stupid to ask a guy/girl to hold off sex when biologicly speaking god allows them to have babies for up to 10-20 years before they get married and they are in their mating prime. . .
I went to an all boys school. Lol, the way the guys were talking, seemed like everyone had plenty action. Last year of schooling (18) they did an anonymous sex survey and 80% of the guys still hadn't lost their virginity! Was pretty funny looking around the class and seeing people pretend they were in the 20% ratio 🙂
Originally posted by shavixmirI can relate, and unfortunenately into my young adult years, that is still carrying over. Women don't like men who make less money then they do, so I'm in trouble. . .
I had to abstain from sex during my early teenage years as well.
It wasn't by bloody choice though! I had a face like a pizza, smelled like a tramp and dressed like a gothic corpse.
Originally posted by mateulose
I can relate, and unfortunenately into my young adult years, that is still carrying over. Women don't like men who make less money then they do, so I'm in trouble. . .
Avoid woman (who care about money) like the plague. In all relationships you need to respect your wife and actually like who she is. When you find a lady that doesn't mind driving in your Honda, you know she's the right one 🙂
Originally posted by CliffLandinBased on what I see with most parents, no pun intended, they are even worse. It's hard to imagine worse, but I CAN BE/GET worse... BTW, aids STD's is not just an American/Western thing, a lot of people think it's because of our sexual freedom that there's tons of problems, but in 3rd world countries, it's even WORSE, and they do not educate ppl or talk about sex at all. HIV is a huge problem, it's essentially a world killer, the true terrorist WMD the world faces. Too bad America is too worried about Saddam's imaginary assault cannons that can reach the mainland USA, but on the plus side, we are overpopulated anyways, so maybe HIV is due. . .
Really the point isn't whether abstinance should be taught or not, the point is that PARENTS should be parents and teach their own children whatever their beliefs are, be it abstinence or protection. We have to stop letting the government raise our children! They aren't very good at it.
Originally posted by pcaspianOK, your all boys school is the polar opposite of my all boys school.
I went to an all boys school. Lol, the way the guys were talking, seemed like everyone had plenty action. Last year of schooling (18) they did an anonymous sex survey and 80% of the guys still hadn't lost their virginity! Was pretty funny looking around the class and seeing people pretend they were in the 20% ratio 🙂