If you murder someone …

moonbus

Über-Nerd (emeritus)

General

24 Jan 23

mlb62

Joined: 20 May 17
Moves: 17548

31 Jan 23

@Torunn
maybe you can find a victim with no tats or dental work... 😀

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

@torunn said
Remove id's, watches, rings, bracelets.

Presumably one has had latex gloves on all this time, right?

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

@ghost-of-a-duke said
If you murder someone, try and ensure you have the same size feet.

One of life's joys is a free pair of shoes.

Not if the victim had stinky feet.

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

@ghost-of-a-duke said
Somebody with size 8 feet please.

I seem to remember the going rate over here in Florida was $10,000 per hit, but admittedly that was decades ago, and not factoring in blackmail, inflation, media rights, etc.

You might do much better to shop online for a pair of Wellies (but please do avoid any Nike signature Wellies -- people have been mugged and left for dead just for wearing those in public).

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

@booger said
Seriously?

I'm a 14 wide.

May I suggest @double-wide as your next username?

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

@moonbus said
And clean under your victim's fingernails, in case you got scratched. Forensics always checks under the victim's finger nails for DNA samples.

They'd have to find the fingers first, wouldn't they?

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

2 edits

@very-rusty said
There is no such thing as the perfect crime, something by the killer is always missed. 🙂

-VR

Yeah, the alleged killer in the Moscow, Iowa case reportedly missed a lot of things.

On a tangent: if there's someone you really hate, just play the waiting game. They're gonna die anyway eventually (unless they are rich enough to afford life-extension treatments -- but people like us probably don't travel in those circles anyway -- so leave the fate of such people to rogue nation-states or the UN).

Kevin Eleven

Joined: 06 May 15
Moves: 27445

31 Jan 23

1 edit

@torunn said
And the murderer didn't notice that one of his coat buttons was missing...

Just as a point of etiquette, what inconsiderate breed of cad does not remove his coat before murdering someone?

And yeah, better to wear a pullover or zip-up with no emotional or nostalgic significance (assuming one is bright enough to dispose of the murder-time apparel afterwards).