Limerick Competition

@rookie54

You know who's responsible for the thumbs down in this thread.

Guess you have to take it as a compliment.

food junky

there was a fellow who loved french fries
chocolate pudding and ice cream pies
his belly would shake
like a mild earthquake
never seemed to run out of supplies

"i think we all can agree"
is my number one pet peeve
you bare yer assumptions
as you show off yer rumpkin
and i hope for yer infestation of fleas

sweet cheeks

I'm rookie54 that's who I am
sweet as molasses and strawberry jam
I'll get the last word
or haven't you heard
I'm sitting on top of bolder dam

insomnia

I took some pills to help fall asleep
tired of counting the same old sheep
no more night time tea
only makes me pee
I hear Adele rolling in the deep

I'm done
this should get some thumbs up

Parched

A man who engaged in athletics
Was told not to take diuretics.
He did anyway
And shriveled away.
"Completely dried up," said the medics.

Snickery trickery snock.
The elephant is wearing a frock.
Now the wind is blowing,
and his bottom is showing...
as his handlers, hide under a rock.

the spiritual are said to have grown
others, merely elicit a groan
between these two
are just me and you
and a single lymrickian koan

A Dream of Flying

Some nights I have dreams I can fly
But what if it goes horribly awry?
I should wear a helmet
In case I do plummet
But sometime I really should try.

A rookie in temple confinement
Saw Tao had no need for refinement.
The Oracle's cookies
Were better than nookies,
But she had bought those on consignment.

There was a bus rider so lunar
He was a pre-Krellian tuner.
Those sandwiches, mang!
He expected some Tang
And he hoped they could get there much sooner.

I try my luck (and hope that it not a complete failure)

Orange man

There was a man with orange hair
who led his friend to despair
he wouldn't accept
anything for a fact
that didn't come out of his rear.

She hailed from Bikini Atoll,
A most inveterate troll,
She called them all liars,
When sent to Blackfriars,
Before each pint she cried, “skol!”

Delivery

There was a young poet from York
Who wrote many tomes about storks
You can't go wrong
With a bird that's so long
And brings babies to ladies and lords.