The Halloween Limerick Competition

It's like banging my head with bricks
Writing sweet, lovely limericks
They're not hard to write
So why do they fight?
Let's make love not war and tricks.

@neilarini said
It's like banging my head with bricks
Writing sweet, lovely limericks
They're not hard to write
So why do they fight?
Let's make love not war and tricks.

Hoe lee jeepers. A limerick thread... and it gets turned into a war zone. Come on.
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There once was a thread from RHP
Wordsters wrote stuff that pleases me
along came a bomb; sat down to glom
and there goes the fun with my tea

There was a man who employed her
Abused her that way, then he fired her
She drugged him one day
In a glass tub he lay
And slowly she boiled him in water

My fridge has just come alive
A cabbage is armed with a knife
The bacon looks lairy
The mushrooms feel scary
So here's hoping they kill my wife.

halloween has come and gone
time to bring out the super bong
filled to the brim
with weeds of sin
now what could possibly go wrong

The entire village was set alight
The church, school and homes burnt bright
The arsenist smiled
"It's been awhile
By 'eck, there's nowt better than bonfire night!"

The evil snail ruled by decree.
Slowly constricted garden mites, did he.
But one day its seems,
he realized worst dreams,
when an angry eagle snacked on him, with glee.

Today I saw a ghost,
sitting there, on my toast.
"Hey man!
get off my jam,"
(I really like this post).

i don't wanna limerick
most of these make me sick
just quiet down
you silly forum clowns
and bring on jolly st nick

The flames they licked higher and crackled and snapped
Panic was raging... the crowd how they clapped
The pain tore my legs
And I started the chant
And then I was skyward with wings how they flapped

There's a bloke live's next door and he's quite a rare sight
Frequently helping folk who are in desperate plight
But he's ugly as sin
And they're out to get him
He's a seven-foot wizard so there'll be a bit of a fight

a fond farewell to halloween
managed to save my kidneys and spleen
ate some pie
drank some rye
slept a lot in between

There came a General after dawn broke
In midst of the pumpkins his voice spoke
“The nighttime was fun
But there’s a purge to be done
Gather witches for burning dear townsfolk”