@shavixmir saidI think the issue of personal space is relevant here. There are some cultural differences, and public transport is a kind of litmus test for how how people cope with body contact involving strangers. Bumping up against people in a crowded metro is expected and tolerated, but groping people is not. In a half-full metro in Switzerland, Germany, or England, for example, people tend to disperse evenly, almost as if they were all north-poled magnets repelling each other to a mutually safe distance. Public transport in Haiti, on the other hand, is so close-packed, one cannot avoid smelling people on every side.
Nature or nurture?
Part of it will be nature.
Think of the fight, flight or freeze reaction. Built in for survival purposes.
And part of it will be nurture. What kids are taught how to behave, what to watch out for, etc.
And part of it will be experience.
Some man sits close to you and starts touching you? Yeah… that would creep anybody out.
Think for a secon ...[text shortened]... specific light. And perhaps you should ask yourself if that’s really how you want to be remembered.
09 Jun 23
@shavixmir said"Some man sits close to you and starts touching you? Yeah… that would creep anybody out"
Nature or nurture?
Part of it will be nature.
Think of the fight, flight or freeze reaction. Built in for survival purposes.
And part of it will be nurture. What kids are taught how to behave, what to watch out for, etc.
And part of it will be experience.
Some man sits close to you and starts touching you? Yeah… that would creep anybody out.
Think for a secon ...[text shortened]... specific light. And perhaps you should ask yourself if that’s really how you want to be remembered.
I never disputed that. You are talking about a man, not a woman. Now imagine a woman does the exact same thing to you. Would that creep you out? Not me. I would be surprised for sure, but not offended. I would be flattered and probably amused. Wouldn't you?
@metal-brain saidYour thread title is ‘Body shyness’ which implies some level of pathology. I do not understand your lack of awareness regarding human nature, do you ever get out and mix with people in the real world?
"that infers some sort of issue on the part of the person who rejects an unwanted attempt at intimacy."
I am suggesting men are far less likely to reject advances from women, even women they hardly know as long as they are attractive. Most women clearly want to know a man before any intimacy takes place. They do not even want a man to ask if they do not know him well. ...[text shortened]... en rape each other a lot to make them body shy? I have not heard about a gay rape problem? Have you?
A woman being more selective about who she is intimate with has nothing to do being shy, how is she to know what her consenting to ‘a cuddle’ will signal to a man who is astronomically more likely to be a sexual predator than a female.
Less dramatically but much more frequently women bear the potential burden of intimacy, namely pregnancy followed by an abortion or parenthood.
Women in a very real sense are the gate keepers to the next generation, it’s their job to be fussy whereas men just check for a pulse.
09 Jun 23
@kevcvs57 saidYou dolt. I understand why perfectly well as I explained on this thread already once before if you had bothered to read my posts. I only asked if it is innate or learned behavior. That is what this debate is about.
Your thread title is ‘Body shyness’ which implies some level of pathology. I do not understand your lack of awareness regarding human nature, do you ever get out and mix with people in the real world?
A woman being more selective about who she is intimate with has nothing to do being shy, how is she to know what her consenting to ‘a cuddle’ will signal to a man who is astro ...[text shortened]... gate keepers to the next generation, it’s their job to be fussy whereas men just check for a pulse.
09 Jun 23
@metal-brain saidkev missed this post.
Men are far more tolerant of sexual advances than women. I understand the biological reason for it. Women want to choose who they get pregnant by. Pretty simple. Men didn't used to be held responsible for it until recently in history.
Is it because women are innately that way or is it learned behavior? And why is just asking for intimacy offensive to women? If a woman ...[text shortened]... would not be offended, I would be flattered. I might say no thanks, but I would still be flattered.
09 Jun 23
@metal-brain saidThe point being, as I’ve stated, what if it was a man doing it to you.
"Some man sits close to you and starts touching you? Yeah… that would creep anybody out"
I never disputed that. You are talking about a man, not a woman. Now imagine a woman does the exact same thing to you. Would that creep you out? Not me. I would be surprised for sure, but not offended. I would be flattered and probably amused. Wouldn't you?
09 Jun 23
@shavixmir saidAnswer my question first
The point being, as I’ve stated, what if it was a man doing it to you.
@metal-brain saidHey halfwit change your thread title to one that a grown up can debate and come back.
You dolt. I understand why perfectly well as I explained on this thread already once before if you had bothered to read my posts. I only asked if it is innate or learned behavior. That is what this debate is about.
Like every other aspect of human behaviour it is neither but a mixture of both you utter tool.
It’s the nature/nurture equation. You would need to study some comparative culture studies to find some kind of answer. But then you wouldn’t know if one culture was suppressing a females natural tendency to be selective or another culture was exaggerating that tendency.
But I still want to know if you got your face slapped recently 🤔
09 Jun 23
@kevcvs57 saidSure it is a mix. My posts reflect that, but what is the primary influence?
Hey halfwit change your thread title to one that a grown up can debate and come back.
Like every other aspect of human behaviour it is neither but a mixture of both you utter tool.
It’s the nature/nurture equation. You would need to study some comparative culture studies to find some kind of answer. But then you wouldn’t know if one culture was suppressing a females natur ...[text shortened]... re was exaggerating that tendency.
But I still want to know if you got your face slapped recently 🤔
Why do women expect men to ask them out on a date? It is no doubt cultural, but isn't there an innate influence? I think women are insuring they avoid shy men because boldness is desirable in a man.
It is easy to say both. Culture tends to follow innate instinct though, not the other way around.
09 Jun 23
@shavixmir saidDepending on who it was, what she looked like, what she smelled like… I could either be creeped out or horny.
The point being, as I’ve stated, what if it was a man doing it to you.
And considering I assume that anything with less than 5 legs and a hearbeat is fukkable… what do you think?
@metal-brain said“It is easy to say both. Culture tends to follow innate instinct though, not the other way around.”
Sure it is a mix. My posts reflect that, but what is the primary influence?
Why do women expect men to ask them out on a date? It is no doubt cultural, but isn't there an innate influence? I think women are insuring they avoid shy men because boldness is desirable in a man.
It is easy to say both. Culture tends to follow innate instinct though, not the other way around.
Then you’ll be able to explain the disparity in female sexual expression between the Victorian era and now.
Or the difference between a female raised in Saudi Arabia and one raised in Michigan in regard to their level of sexual freedom and expression.
Nurture is massively significant but you have to stand back from your host culture to evaluate its impact.
09 Jun 23
@kevcvs57 saidYou still have not answered my question
“It is easy to say both. Culture tends to follow innate instinct though, not the other way around.”
Then you’ll be able to explain the disparity in female sexual expression between the Victorian era and now.
Or the difference between a female raised in Saudi Arabia and one raised in Michigan in regard to their level of sexual freedom and expression.
Nurture is massively significant but you have to stand back from your host culture to evaluate its impact.
09 Jun 23
@metal-brain saidNever studied psychology, have you?
Sure it is a mix. My posts reflect that, but what is the primary influence?
Why do women expect men to ask them out on a date? It is no doubt cultural, but isn't there an innate influence? I think women are insuring they avoid shy men because boldness is desirable in a man.
It is easy to say both. Culture tends to follow innate instinct though, not the other way around.