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Physics = funny.

Physics = funny.

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
Physicist - Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle basicly states you can know either the velocity of a thing , or it's location , but you can't know both as they are exclusive of one another .
Fun (and somewhat related) physics fact: If you walk slowly enough through a doorway, you'll be seen to diffract. 😲

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
Physicist - Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle basicly states you can know either the velocity of a thing , or it's location , but you can't know both as they are exclusive of one another .
Hence, for all you Star Trek buffs, the scriptwriters invented a "Heisenberg Compensator" to enable the transporter to work.

"How does it work?" I hear you ask?

Very well, apparently. 😵

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
Physicist - Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle basicly states you can know either the velocity of a thing , or it's location , but you can't know both as they are exclusive of one another .
That's quite incorrect.

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Originally posted by Bowmann
That's quite incorrect.
Are you certain?

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
Are you certain?
Where is he , anyway ?

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Some other physicist was nailed for driving through a red light. He claimed the light looked green because of the blue shift caused by his car approaching the light.

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Originally posted by squaccerman
Werner Heisenberg was driving his car at great speed along the autobahn when a traffic police car pulled him over. The police officer approached the car, and as Heisenberg opened his window enquired of him "Do you know how fast you wer ...[text shortened]... ng, sir?". "No," replied Heisenberg. "But I know where I am."
Nice! You've got my rec!

Michael

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Originally posted by sasquatch672
Come on man. Do you know who Heisenberg was? Or his principle? Goofball?
Lose ten points for not getting the SECOND joke.

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Originally posted by Bowmann
That's quite incorrect.
Dude you are something else. You state that something is quite incorrect wihtout offering any reasons and in fact you are also quite wrong.

This is Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle:

In the Quantum Mechanical world, the idea that we can measure things exactly breaks down. Let me state this notion more precisely. Suppose a particle has momemtum p and a position x. In a Quantum Mechanical world, I would not be able to measure p and x precisely. There is an uncertainty associated with each measurement, e.g., there is some dp and dx, which I can never get rid of even in a perfect experiment!!!. This is due to the fact that whenever I make a measurement, I must disturb the system. (In order for me to know something is there, I must bump into it.) The size of the uncertainties are not independent, they are roughly related by

* (uncertainty in p) x (uncertainty in position) is larger than h (= Planck's constant)

So basically you can never be sure of both location and momentum of a particle. An easier way of saying this is that you cannot acuurately measure all the properties of a system because by taking that measurement you are disturbing the system, thereby causing error in the accuracy of those measurements.

Next time you butt in with a statement like 'you are wrong' please a) be sure of your statement b)back it up with evidence.

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Originally posted by Starrman
Dude you are something else. You state that something is quite incorrect wihtout offering any reasons and in fact you are also quite wrong.

This is Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle:

In the Quantum Mechanical world, the idea that we can measure things exactly breaks down. Let me state this notion more precisely. Suppose a particle has momemtum p an ...[text shortened]... tatement like 'you are wrong' please a) be sure of your statement b)back it up with evidence.
i think he meant it was wrong because the post he was referring generalised it to any 'thing', whereas it only applies to subatomic particles.
Normal things like cars arent significantly affected by the things u use to look at them and determine their location/speed (such as the photons in light, or electrons in an electron microscope)

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Originally posted by Starrman
Dude you are something else. You state that something is quite incorrect wihtout offering any reasons and in fact you are also quite wrong.

This is Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle:

In the Quantum Mechanical world, the idea that we can measure things exactly breaks down. Let me state this notion more precisely. Suppose a particle has momemtum p an ...[text shortened]... tatement like 'you are wrong' please a) be sure of your statement b)back it up with evidence.
well - he was kinda right with his statement of wrongness. people were saying velocity, but it's actually the momentum you cannot measure...

and as to it only referring to microscopic and not macroscopic (😉) thigns, that was the point of schrodingers cat, that the cat's wave function depended upon the wave function of the radioactive particle...although if it all related absolutly, due to quantum tunnelling i can walk through walls! 🙂

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i can't edit my post for some reason, so can you all imagine that i spelled "things" right, and i put a full stop after "schrodingers cat" instead of a comma and took away the "that" from after it?

thanks

🙂

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Originally posted by genius
i can't edit my post for some reason, so can you all imagine that i spelled "things" right, and i put a full stop after "schrodingers cat" instead of a comma and took away the "that" from after it?

thanks

🙂
Sorry, I don't think I can. I watched too much TV as a child, and my imagination is therefore too lightweight to deal with your request. I don't know exactly how lightweight because I have my imagination localised within my skull.

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The original thread title is Physics = funny, I guess you all meant funny peculiar.

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Originally posted by genius
well - he was kinda right with his statement of wrongness. people were saying velocity, but it's actually the momentum you cannot measure...

and as to it only referring to microscopic and not macroscopic (😉) thigns, that was the point of schrodingers cat, that the cat's wave function depended upon the wave function of the radioactive particle...although if it all related absolutly, due to quantum tunnelling i can walk through walls! 🙂
I'm not pretending to be a physisict . I knew there's much more to it , I was inaccurate to the point of "wrong" , and that I was also grossly over-simplifying . I did this to A-Play off the origional joke . B- Explaining it to someone completely unfamiliar with it . C-Setting up a new joke .

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