Bible Battles

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
If they reset it in Chicago, he's a shoe-in.

And definitely have Al Capone (acted by Keanu "My Voice is Too Deep" Reeves) as king of the modern Sodom & Gomorrah.

Originally posted by Halitose
And definitely have Al Capone (acted by Keanu "My Voice is Too Deep" Reeves) as king of the modern Sodom & Gomorrah.

...with... uh, Kevin Costner as Abraham/Elliot Ness?

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
...with... uh, Kevin Costner as Abraham/Elliot Ness?

lol

Originally posted by Halitose
lol

I'm here all week. Try the veal.

Originally posted by Halitose
lol

It's fun to watch you good Christians trivialize the mass murders done in the OT.

Originally posted by frogstomp
It's fun to watch you good Christians trivialize the mass murders done in the OT.

Trying to poke another fight, my good friend? Not this time; 'tis a season to be merry.

Edit: Good to see you around more.

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
Bored to death of the John Denver look-alike, I missed Gere's rendition. Did it cover the battle between David and Abbie?

I didn't know about the film before today--but the very idea of Richard Gere in that role would be enough to put me off seeing it. Except, perhaps, for laughs.

Originally posted by frogstomp
It's fun to watch you good Christians trivialize the mass murders done in the OT.

C'mon frogstomp--as Lucifershammer once said, they were probably just a few skirmishes that got blown out of proportion.

Originally posted by no1marauder
What are your favorite Bible battles (no lame jokes, please)?

As long as this is not about to turn into one of those "Oh see how absolutely savage the OT is" threads.

My favourite battle would be the seige of Jericho. In terms of wars, it would be the Maccabean Revolt.

Originally posted by lucifershammer
In terms of wars, it would be the Maccabean Revolt.

Pity the Protestants don't get to read about that one, it's fascinating--Jewish terrorists building up a state-of-the-art army from scratch to take on the mighty Seleucids with their pikes, cavalry, & elephants.

Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
Jewish terrorists building up a ....

We prefer the term "freedom fighters". 😉

Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
Pity the Protestants don't get to read about that one, it's fascinating--Jewish terrorists building up a state-of-the-art army from scratch to take on the mighty Seleucids with their pikes, cavalry, & elephants.

I'm sorry, I'm Protestant (although you'd have a hard time trying to pin a title any more specific than that on me) and 1 & 2 Maccabees were some of my favourite "Bible-history" books as a child.

Originally posted by lucifershammer
We prefer the term "freedom fighters".

I've become pro-terrorist. It's just easier that way.

Originally posted by Halitose
I'm sorry, I'm Protestant (although you'd have a hard time trying to pin a title any more specific than that on me) and 1 & 2 Maccabees were some of my favourite "Bible-history" books as a child.

Well done, Hal.

Originally posted by telerion
I'm pretty sure they've already made one.

Ah yes, King David back in 1985. Richard Gere played the archaelogically absent King David, and there was one heck of a nude scene where Bathsheba bathed herself in full majesty on the rooftop.

Well, worth watching. And rewinding and watching again. and again.
and again.

😵

Alice Krige played Bathsheba, better known for the Borg Queen in the Star Trek film First Contact.

I'd have liked to have seen Samson slay the 1000 Philistines with the jawbone of an ass. That's some hardcore ass-kicking.