- Joined
- 18 Jan 07
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Originally posted by @phil3000Did you hear about the Belgian terrorist who decided to blow up a car? Burnt his mouth on the exhaust.
Did you hear about the Irish window fitter ?
He fitted ten planes of glass and then he realised he had a cracked lens in his spectacles .
Originally posted by @shallow-blueDid you hear about the lion in the circus that ate the clown ?
Did you hear about the Belgian terrorist who decided to blow up a car? Burnt his mouth on the exhaust.
Another lion asked him " how did the clown taste " ?
The lion replied " not sure really ,but my stomach feels a bit funny "
Originally posted by @bongallojoeHow highs a China man ?
Why did the old man fall into the well??
He couldn't see that well.
Ba Dumb Tssss
Originally posted by @pawnpawI was in the pub with my missus .
What's the (correlation?) between the words bra and bar?
Both have the same letters, are drinking places, have limited open times, and when they're open, men go mad! 😵
I said too her " you have too stop drinking ,you have had too much "
She asked me how I knew ?
I told her .." your face has gone all blurry "
Originally posted by @pawnpawMan says to his wife " get your coat on love "
Husband asks his wife:"what would you do if I won the Lotto?"
Wife:" I'll take half of it, leave you immediately and go back to my mother!"
Husband:" Good, just what I wanted to hear! I won thirty dollars, here's your half, and greetings to your mother!"
" great " she said " where are we going "? she asked
" well, I am going too the pub and turning the heating off ,your staying in "
Originally posted by @phil3000A doctor visited a mental home ,the first patient he saw was pretending to drive a car ,".brrrum "....." brrrum " ...".brrrum"... he said as he turned an imaginary steering wheel .
Man says to his wife " get your coat on love "
" great " she said " where are we going "? she asked
" well, I am going too the pub and turning the heating off ,your staying in "
" What are you doing? " asked the doctor .....
The man replied ....." I am driving my Rolls Royce around the streets of London "
" but you do not have a car " the doctor told the man
Then ,..the man in the next bed said to the Doctor .." I wish you hadn't told him that " ...".Why ?" asked the doctor
The man replied .." because I was getting £10 a week for cleaning it "