Misunderstandings

I found that parcel you were carrying earlier. It was left under that limousine over there. Here look I brought it over, seems to be some sort of clock from the noise it's making.

I was in Alexandros' studio when he was sculpting his Venus de Milo. He was almost finished and we left for the night. Later that night I returned and loped of her arms. We returned in the morning and when he saw what had happened he was furious. He said, in Greek of course, " What swine would do such a thing to my beautiful creation?" Being, like Venda, unable to tell a lie, I put up my hand and told him it was I. He looked at me and then at his sculpture and smiled saying, again in Greek, "Ya know Stees, I think I like it".

Travelling in France by car, exhausted, and looking for a place to stay for the night, I knocked at the "Hotel de Ville" -- hotel in the village, right? I speak no French, the occupants spoke no English or German. So I pantomimed that I wanted to sleep to there. They looked at me as if I were from Pluto. Eventually the gendarmes moved me on.

Having not found a place to sleep, I went to the pharmacy to stoke up on vitamins. I had heard that vitamins in France are sometimes sold with some sort of preservatives. I did not wish to stoke up on preservatives, so I asked the shop clerk for "vitamins sans preservatif" -- again that look as if from Pluto. I insisted. The gendarmes came again. I left that town without sleep or vitamins.

@rookie54 said

i'm so sorry torunn for ruining yer perfectly good thread with my rustyness