How do you cope with loneliness?

@very-rusty said
I believe if someone is having issues with being rejected and a problem handling it, they should seek help. This is not a sign of being weak, but strong enough to seek the help.

-VR

The fear of being rejected is often the reason why many people prefer to stay in poor relationships.

@torunn said
The fear of being rejected is often the reason why many people prefer to stay in poor relationships. We have to learn to deal with it.

I don't understand why anyone would stay in a poor relationship. You don't learn to deal with it, you do something about it!

-VR

@very-rusty said
I don't understand why anyone would stay in a poor relationship. You don't deal with it, you do something about it!

-VR

That's their tragedy, it's too difficult for them.

@torunn said
That's their tragedy, it's too difficult for them.

It is Sad! Perhaps someone who knows them have to jump in and help them out.

-VR

@very-rusty said
It is Sad! Perhaps someone who knows them have to jump in and help them out.

-VR

It isn't easy for anyone in such situations, that's all I know, and I'm not talking from my own experience.

@torunn said
It isn't easy for anyone in such situations, that's all I know, and I'm not talking from my own experience.

I never said anything about it being easy. I said they have to do something about it not just live with it. I never for a moment thought you were talking about yourself.

I really couldn't see you staying in a situation you didn't want to be in.

-VR

@very-rusty said
I never said anything about it being easy. I said they have to do something about it not just live with it. I never for a moment thought you were talking about yourself.

I really couldn't see you staying in a situation you didn't want to be in.

-VR

True Rusty, when it came to leaving a situation I was unhappy with, it was never a problem for me, so you are right there. I live the only way I can - single but with a family and good friends.

@torunn said
True Rusty, when it came to leaving a situation I was unhappy with, it was never a problem for me, so you are right there. I live the only way I can - single but with a family and good friends.

It almost sounded to me though that it might be someone that you did know. Perhaps I am incorrect about that, and you were just talking about the situation itself.

-VR

@very-rusty said
It almost sounded to me though that it might be someone that you did know. Perhaps I am incorrect about that, and you were just talking about the situation itself.

-VR

I was referring relationships I have seen and heard of among my close friends and their families, and acquaintances - not my personal experiences. I know it can be very difficult to make up your mind about the right thing to do, some people need longer time than others to dare take the step and leave.

@very-rusty said
I don't understand why anyone would stay in a poor relationship. You don't learn to deal with it, you do something about it!

-VR

Some people resort to horrific ways to get out of a relationship as that of a British woman who is going through an appeal having murdered her husband in a dreadful attack. She is said to be a victim of coercive control:

https://www.cedarnetwork.org.uk/about/supporting-recovery/what-is-domestic-abuse/what-is-coercive-control/

@drewnogal said
Some people resort to horrific ways to get out of a relationship as that of a British woman who is going through an appeal having murdered her husband in a dreadful attack. She is said to be a victim of coercive control:

https://www.cedarnetwork.org.uk/about/supporting-recovery/what-is-domestic-abuse/what-is-coercive-control/

Without meaning to pigeonhole, there are personality types in various psychological models which are flagged up as being prone to being abused.

Take for example the INTJ in Myers Briggs, these people are often workhorses, company champions, diligent completer-finishers, upholders of the company values and stickler from the rules. They can also be put upon at work, loaded and loaded with more workload until they break. I’ve seem it happen first hand.

I’m sure there is an equivalent modelling for domestic relationships. Domestic mental abuse and control is real and horrible. It’s torture I would say.

@divegeester said

I’m sure there is an equivalent modelling for domestic relationships. Domestic mental abuse and control is real and horrible. It’s torture I would say.

It is still a situation you can get out of without killing people I would like to think.
There is more help now for domestic violence and mental abuse including control than ever before. I'm sure it is a scarey position to be in but one that there is help for, at least here in Canada there is. Of course the person being abused has to seek the help, or a neighbour reports it. I certainly wouldn't stand by and watch it.

-VR