Jokes

neil diamond used to be neil coal but the pressure got to him

joke about the mail all you want


sometimes you just gotta push the envelope

you know what they say about postal jokes

it's all in the delivery

@rookie54 said
you know what they say about postal jokes

it's all in the delivery

@wolfgang59 said
they need stamping out

daddy once told me
"yeah, she's hotter than a ten dollar pistol,
and twice as much trouble"

dammit i need to learn to listen

@rookie54 said
daddy once told me
"yeah, she's hotter than a ten dollar pistol,
and twice as much trouble"

dammit i need to learn to listen

you say it's hot enough to fry eggs on the sidewalk?

my eggs hard boiled themselves in my refrigerator

i used to think restless leg syndrome was a pain in the ass

then i realized that if i just lay my fitbit on my knee i can get 15000 steps in a half hour

A man Comes to the doctor and complains about his shaking
-Do you drink a lot alcohol?
- No the most part I lose by my constant shaking

i have a jetpack for sale
only used once
works REAL good

A man takes his elderly father to the doctor.
When the exam is done, the nurse says, "We're going to need a urine sample,
a stool sample, a sperm sample, and a blood sample."
The old man, hard at hearing said, "What?"
The son yelled at his father, "Dad, just leave your underwear".

If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?
- The Trump Card

Why does Donald Trump take Xanax?
- For Hispanic attacks.

What does Donald Trump say when he takes Viagra?
- "I need to rig this erection!"

Want to make Halloween great again?
- Carve a Trumpkin.

The difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan is:
- If Donald Trump gets Alzheimer's, his IQ will go up.




What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes? Answer: The back of his head.

some folks burn the bridge behind them


i use dynamite

I bought a dog of a blacksmith and when I got it home it made a bolt for the back gate.