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Linkenheim

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@badradger said
eliminated but Dives smell would linger.
mandatory joke:

There is a man, he is dying in his bed in his home. He smells something amazing.
It's the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate, four of them, just out of the oven.

And with his last human strength, he reaches over to take one of the cookies, and his wife sees him, she rushes over, she slaps his hand, and she says, "No, they are for the funeral."

Shallow Blue

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This old geezer was visiting his son and daughter-in-law, and he asked them for a newspaper. "Come on, man, this is the 21st century! We don't have any newspapers in the house. Here, take this iPad instead."

The good news is, that wasp is very, very dead.

R
Standard memberRemoved

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a dumb blonde(Divegeester ) is staggering home drunk, a helpfull policeman asks where she lives so he can take her home, she replies"see the 2 semi detached bungalows at the top of the bank well I LIVE IN THE ONE IN THE MIDDLE"

Kevin Eleven

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I tried telling some jokes to a beachcomber, but he always took things littorally.

Torunn

Gothenburg

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19 Aug 22

You can't buy happiness but you can buy fish'n chips, and that's kind of the same thing.

divegeester

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19 Aug 22

@torunn said
You can't buy happiness but you can buy fish'n chips, and that's kind of the same thing.
Do you have good fish and chip shops in Gothenburg?

Torunn

Gothenburg

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1 edit

@divegeester said
Do you have good fish and chip shops in Gothenburg?
Not so much I think - some restaurants have it on their a la carte menu. We usually have, for a quick meal, hot dogs (all kinds, all sizes) with home-made mash potatoes, burgers with fries and kebab. The text I showed was from a sign outside a lunch restaurant. 🙂

divegeester

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@torunn said
Not so much I think - some restaurants have it on their a la carte menu. We usually have, for a quick meal, hot dogs (all kinds, all sizes) with home-made mash potatoes, burgers with fries and kebab. The text I showed was from a sign outside a lunch restaurant. 🙂
Lots of restaurants here offer fish and chips but I have rarely come across any which serve them as delicious as a good takeaway. There is one place called the “Heron of the Lake in Fleet which was a notable exception.

https://www.destinationinns.co.uk/pubs/theherononthelake/

Torunn

Gothenburg

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@divegeester said
Lots of restaurants here offer fish and chips but I have rarely come across any which serve them as delicious as a good takeaway. There is one place called the “Heron of the Lake in Fleet which was a notable exception.

https://www.destinationinns.co.uk/pubs/theherononthelake/
We have a few pubs and I guess they will serve fish'n chips as a traditional meal.

A Unique Nickname

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2800

Ponderable
chemist

Linkenheim

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19 Aug 22

@divegeester said
Do you have good fish and chip shops in Gothenburg?
mandatory joke:


A traveler stopped at a monastery and they invited him to stay for a delicious dinner of fish and chips.
After dinner he went in the kitchen and asked a guy "Are you the fish friar?" and the guy said "No I'm the chip monk."

Ghost of a Duke

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19 Aug 22

If you meet a girl covered in bee stings and smelling like honey,

you'll know she's a keeper.

Torunn

Gothenburg

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20 Aug 22

A good man can make you feel sexy, strong and ready to take on the world...Oh sorry, that's wine, wine does that.

divegeester

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20 Aug 22

@ghost-of-a-duke said
If you meet a girl covered in bee stings and smelling like honey,

you'll know she's a keeper.
I remember my Dad telling me that one; one of the kids in his class told him.

divegeester

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20 Aug 22

News headline

“dwarf shortage”

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