Let's try getting it said in story form...

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
The THIRD frog (not including Froggy...remember there were a total of four) and in it's mouth was, not a frog, but a mickey of Jack Daniels. "This", it hissed, "will do until we can get our bosses to come back (they didn't know what had happened) with a bigger one". Between the three of them they managed, through some interesting contortions, to undo to figure out a way to get the frogs some more food and pretty soon.....TO BE CONTINUED

Miami, Florida to host the next winter olympics, film at 11. Now back to our feature presentation "Attack of the Mutant Frogs".......

The frogs grew silent, The snakes began tho grow alarmed at this. Unknown to not only the snakes, but the town's people too, a UFO had crashed in the pond and produced a radiation leak that affected the insects first. Now it was the frogs turn. (the snakes were unaffected as they were working the Frog pond at the time) First their eyes turned a glowing yellow, then their legs grew even larger and they began to stand up on their hind legs. Slowly the croaking became replaced with human speech. Speech about revenge.......

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
Miami, Florida to host the next winter olympics, film at 11. Now back to our feature presentation "Attack of the Mutant Frogs".......

The frogs grew silent, She snakes began tho grow alarmed at this. Unknown to not only the snakes, but the town's people too, a UFO had crashed in the pond and produced a radiation leak that affected the insects first ...[text shortened]... hind legs. Slowly the croaking became replaced with human speech. Speech about revenge.......

Timrek, the first to speak and as such the leader, said,"Follow me" at which point he fell flat on his face. "OK hang on a minute let's first get used to walking upright and then follow me". It took only a few practice steps for them to get the gist of walking on the back limbs and they were off. Timrek instructed the largest of the frogs to "attack" the pens gate which was no match for their bulk. They were now free to decend on the town. As they made their way towards town they grew in size to the point that when they reached town they had grown to three feet. Now that may seem to be a pretty small in stature but remember we're talking talking frogs here. Timrek headed straight for the local watering hole in hopes of finding enough Jack Daniels for the hoard. Yes it seems that through their experience with the Whiskey drinking snakes they'd acquired a taste for the Tennessee grog.

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
Timrek, the first to speak and as such the leader, said,"Follow me" at which point he fell flat on his face. "OK hang on a minute let's first get used to walking upright and then follow me". It took only a few practice steps for them to get the gist of walking on the back limbs and they were off. Timrek instructed the largest of the frogs to "attack" ...[text shortened]... rience with the Whiskey drinking snakes they'd acquired a taste for the Tennessee grog.

At that very moment the waters began to stir in the swamp, waves pounded the shore. Up out of the swamp, rising at least 3 meters above the water, was none other than frogger. He dripped radioactive water and his eyes glowing bright yellow. His very hissing shook the leaves on the tree.

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
At that very moment the waters began to stir in the swamp, waves pounded the shore. Up out of the swamp, rising at least 3 meters above the water, was none other than frogger. He dripped radioactive water and his eyes glowing bright yellow. His very hissing shook the leaves on the tree.

Timrek turned at the sound of the leaves rustling. "Odd" he thought, "there was no wind". He shook it off as a freak of nature (this from a freak of nature). Little did he or any of the other frogs no what was soon to be their fate.

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
Timrek turned at the sound of the leaves rustling. "Odd" he thought, "there was no wind". He shook it off as a freak of nature (this from a freak of nature). Little did he or any of the other frogs no what was soon to be their fate.

Swimming ashore Frogger spotted what looked like a cross between a giant skeeter and a muskrat. Was it friend, Foe or food. Something about it looked like his old master. He tasted the air with his forked tounge......It was his old master. to Frogger's suprise a voice uttered from his own mouth. "Is that you?" The creacher looked up "Snark" it responded.

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
Swimming ashore Frogger spotted what looked like a cross between a giant skeeter and a muskrat. Was it friend, Foe or food. Something about it looked like his old master. He tasted the air with his forked tounge......It was his old master. to Frogger's suprise a voice uttered from his own mouth. "Is that you?" The creacher looked up "Snark" it responded.

Just then, out of the blue, came the sound of screeching tires then a thud as a'63 Merc pickup, just like the one that crashed into the old oak tree and burst into flames, slammed into the "thing" (a cross between a giant skeeter and a muskrat) propelling it 60 feet down the road and into the oncoming traffic. Darn thing was roadkill. Frogger slithered down to were the thing lay a mangled piece of totured flesh and bone and said to it, "I'll avenge this boss if it takes the rest of my life revenge shall be mine". A tear welled up in his left eye (he had no tearduct in his right) as he turned to make his first movement towards his promised revenge.

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
Just then, out of the blue, came the sound of screeching tires then a thud as a'63 Merc pickup, just like the one that crashed into the old oak tree and burst into flames, slammed into the "thing" (a cross between a giant skeeter and a muskrat) propelling it 60 feet down the road and into the oncoming traffic. Darn thing was roadkill. Frogger slither ...[text shortened]... arduct in his right) as he turned to make his first movement towards his promised revenge.

Frogger failed to notice the humanoid driver at the wheel but did notice the truck never shifted gears. He thought to himself "Was it the female friend of his old boss.....no for she couldn't drive the truck very straight and this driver drove straight as an arrow. Drove straight rightinto a pine tree. He slithered his new giant size toward the pine tree. Lo and behold there set behind the wheel a little grey, almost human looking person: age and gender unknown. Frogger drug the body from the wreckage and began CPR, thumping its chest with his tail. The alien came to........

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
Frogger failed to notice the humanoid driver at the wheel but did notice the truck never shifted gears. He thought to himself "Was it the female friend of his old boss.....no for she couldn't drive the truck very straight and this driver drove straight as an arrow. Drove straight rightinto a pine tree. He slithered his new giant size toward the pine t ...[text shortened]... y from the wreckage and began CPR, thumping its chest with his tail. The alien came to........

"Crork, snizzle, preg" it gasped, after coming to. Frogger was at a loss. He tried to find meaning for these three sounds/words in his lexicon but was unable to. He spoke directly into what, to him , looked like an "ear opening" on the side of the body's head. "I don't understand. Do you speak either cottonmouth of english?" "Crork, snizzle, preg", came the reply. Frogger managed, with some difficulty, to get it into an upright position when suddenly he eard, "Thank you for your help..what happened?" Frogger proceeded to explain what had transpired in the past few minutes. The "thing" couldn't understand how all that could have happened. It said, "The last thing in my memory is of my craft landing, abruptly, near a pond". Frogger then asked it what 'Crork, snizzle, preg' meant. The thing smiled and said" God Bless America"


OK it really meant"What the hell" but I've taken some literary licence

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
"Crork, snizzle, preg" it gasped, after coming to. Frogger was at a loss. He tried to find meaning for these three sounds/words in his lexicon but was unable to. He spoke directly into what, to him , looked like an "ear opening" on the side of the body's head. "I don't understand. Do you speak either cottonmouth of english?" "Crork, snizzle, preg", c ...[text shortened]...
OK it really meant"What the hell" but I've taken some literary licence

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And now back to the story......

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
And now a word from our "Backer": So you find yourself looking in the mirror every morning and saying "Is it me or I'm I going bald and grey?" Well if that's true we have just the thing for you....Stavros Arkamedeuos' hair plugs. Yes we, at SA, have plugs from backs of young, verile, dark haired Greek men from the Isle of Corfu. In just 5 or 6 visits ...[text shortened]... sted in all the best bars from Athens to Sparta.
And now back to the story......

Back at the ranch, the snakes consulted about what too do about the saving their reputation as a very agressive venomous pitviper. Claude, the old and wise, offered the first suggestion. "Let's go back to basics. We are after all a poisonous snake, we shall bite and kill off as many of the mutant frogs as possible." The other three found theselves in agreement. Unbeknownst to the snakes, all the Jack Daniels had altered the chemical makeup of the venom.......

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
Back at the ranch, the snakes consulted about what too do about the saving their reputation as a very agressive venomous pitviper. Claude, the old and wise, offered the first suggestion. "Let's go back to basics. We are after all a poisonous snake, we shall bite and kill off as many of the mutant frogs as possible." The other three found theselves in ...[text shortened]... ownst to the snakes, all the Jack Daniels had altered the chemical makeup of the venom.......

...and instead of killing the frogs it just made them very "happy" which didn't make the snakes "happy" at all because try as they might, they were unable, after a period of time, to get the frogs under control. As we all know there's nothing more maddening than a "happy" three foot mutant frog. They ran roughshod through town stepping on the snakes and knocking over the townsfolk. The mayor finally had had enough and called for the reserves to come in and clean up. Colonel Beauregard Thistleburnt was the commander in charge. He got all the details from Mayor Adelman and determined that his best chance was to get a lot of flies, grubs and worms because he knew that when a frog gets "happy" like humans that get "happy" they have a big hunger on.

Originally posted by Great Big Stees
...and instead of killing the frogs it just made them very "happy" which didn't make the snakes "happy" at all because try as they might, they were unable, after a period of time, to get the frogs under control. As we all know there's nothing more maddening than a "happy" three foot mutant frog. They ran roughshod through town stepping on the snakes ...[text shortened]... hat when a frog gets "happy" like humans that get "happy" they have a big hunger on.

Timrek, as leader brought up the fact to the hoard that flies could no longer be the source of subsistance than met their dietary needs. Their type and source prey had to change and change quickly. Humans were to big and didn't taste very good either. then Daot the second in comand made an excellent choice.......Chickens. There was a chicken farm just outside town ran by a Grandfather Roberts. his chickens were famous for their plumpness and flavor.

Originally posted by expuddlepirate
Timrek, as leader brought up the fact to the hoard that flies could no longer be the source of subsistance than met their dietary needs. Their type and source prey had to change and change quickly. Humans were to big and didn't taste very good either. then Daot the second in comand made an excellent choice.......Chickens. There was a chicken farm just ...[text shortened]... ide town ran by a Grandfather Roberts. his chickens were famous for their plumpness and flavor.

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