18 Mar 13
1 edit
Originally posted by Great Big Stees... don't be timid, just speak to the limpopo county's professional cat and dog vegetarian and medical doc soc rates, phd.
I could, in my spare time, take that on but I'd expect a hot tub down by the river and a water buffalo to help with the towelling of the veggies.
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Originally posted by Grampy BobbyI believe he/she's gone on an expedition into the Limpopo's dense jungle in search for some "special" leaves from the "special tree". Some sort of witchdoctor ceremony to be held on the night of the Wayneing Moon. Didn't you get the notice?
... don't be timid, just speak to the limpopo county's professional cat and dog vegetarian and medical doc soc rates, phd.
19 Mar 13
Originally posted by Great Big Steeswill it continue to be your way to travel with the herd, rather than try something neW
I believe he/she's gone on an expedition into the Limpopo's dense jungle in search for some "special" leaves from the "special tree". Some sort of witchdoctor ceremony to be held on the night of the Wayneing Moon. Didn't you get the notice?
19 Mar 13
1 edit
Originally posted by Great Big Steesdr chu was my favorite professor back in the weak when i was still hungry for wisdom.
I'd, once again, put my name forward but I fear I may have already bitten off more than I can Chu.
but didn't you ask to become the fermented beverages forager / dart pub manager?
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19 Mar 13
Originally posted by Grampy BobbyI beleive there was a "posting" for the position and as no one else appeared to apply I, by default, got the post. As we speak I am in my canoe, hand hewn by yours truly, from the trunk of the "special" tree, paddling upstream down the mighty Limpopo in search of the spirits.
dr chu was my favorite professor back in the weak when i was still hungry for wisdom.
but didn't you ask to become the fermented beverages forager / dart pub manager?
19 Mar 13
Originally posted by Great Big SteesMy special tree was repossessed by the banks due to a failure
I beleive there was a "posting" for the position and as no one else appeared to apply I, by default, got the post. As we speak I am in my canoe, hand hewn by yours truly, from the trunk of the "special" tree, paddling upstream down the mighty Limpopo in search of the spirits.
to pay this months mortgage of juniper berries and almond nuts.
I delegated this duty to wife no.3 and she has failed in her task.
I have done the ritual divorce dance and handed her the sacred
palm leaf which is the symbol of singularity.
Wife no. 4 has now been promoted to Wife no. 3.
As a mark of respect and status I have done the upgrading
of status dance and I have washed her body in coconut oil.
She in turn conferred upon me the sash of pine strips in honour
of her newly found status.
She who was wife no. 3 has been banished from the village
and had to endure the rapids of the Limpopo river and the
crocodiles therein.
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19 Mar 13
Originally posted by johnnylongwoodyWell that explains this woman I picked out of the river. She was battling a monsterous croc who, by the way, she dispatched with ease. You know if she was #3 I might have held onto her and used her as a bodyguard. Now that I've "saved" her is she now mine?
My special tree was repossessed by the banks due to a failure
to pay this months mortgage of juniper berries and almond nuts.
I delegated this duty to wife no.3 and she has failed in her task.
I have done the ritual divorce dance and handed her the sacred
palm leaf which is the symbol of singularity.
Wife no. 4 has now been promoted to Wife ...[text shortened]... rom the village
and had to endure the rapids of the Limpopo river and the
crocodiles therein.
19 Mar 13
Originally posted by Great Big SteesYou will have to do the ritual marriage dance.
Well that explains this woman I picked out of the river. She was battling a monsterous croc who, by the way, she dispatched with ease. You know if she was #3 I might have held onto her and used her as a bodyguard. Now that I've "saved" her is she now mine?
It takes about 5 hours and she must still be
in possession of the sacred palm of singularity
that she received from her previous husband (me).
If that is in order then the ritual can begin.
First you must catch a lion and kill it with
your bare hands to show your love for her.
Then you both must drink the blood of the lion.
After that the dance begins. While you are dancing
the other single women of the village must prepare
her marriage dress. This could take some time
depending on the lineage of your family and the
colouration of their eyes and their skin.
The dress must match perfectly.
A water buffalo is then prepared on an open fire
for the wedding feast. The whole village must be
invited or your new wife will not be acceptable.
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19 Mar 13
Originally posted by johnnylongwoodyWaaaaaay too much to do so I tossed her back in the Limpopo and wished her well. She's not a particularly sophisticated woman because as she slipped under the surface she shot me "the bird".
You will have to do the ritual marriage dance.
It takes about 5 hours and she must still be
in possession of the sacred palm of singularity
that she received from her previous husband (me).
If that is in order then the ritual can begin.
First you must catch a lion and kill it with
your bare hands to show your love for her.
Then you both mu ...[text shortened]... the wedding feast. The whole village must be
invited or your new wife will not be acceptable.
19 Mar 13
Originally posted by Great Big SteesSome girls can be weird.
Waaaaaay too much to do so I tossed her back in the Limpopo and wished her well. She's not a particularly sophisticated woman because as she slipped under the surface she shot me "the bird".
One girl said to me my love for you is like a candle.
If you forget about me I'll burn your f*****G house down.