Tough decisions when you are a parent

@divegeester said
You’re a parent asking this?

Yes, I'm asking you this.
You're saying a village used to help raise and now the community influences.
Are you assuming it's a negative influence and a positive to raise because the intensions have changed from the close village who vested interests in the next generation and the community who don't?

@ghost-of-a-duke said
If a pair of identical twins were separated at birth and grew up in profoundly different societies would their shared nature negate the separate nurture they experienced?

If they were separated at birth then the nurture they received would be different and your hypothesis would be spoiled.

@divegeester said
Yes, so it’s a modern metaphor (not a fact) for what might have occurred in the raising of children in small tightly knit communities from the Stone or medieval ages, but as you said on the previous page doesn’t happen now.

Close neighbourhoods can help contributing to the safety of the children - I grew up in such a small community. When my mother and father were at work, the other mothers mostly did the housework in their families and I was welcome to them for help or company. And if I did something wrong, I was told that too.

@yo-its-me said
Yes, I'm asking you this.
You're saying a village used to help raise and now the community influences.
Are you assuming it's a negative influence and a positive to raise because the intensions have changed from the close village who vested interests in the next generation and the community who don't?

I’m saying that communities don’t raise children; the parents, grandparents, perhaps siblings and other family members do.

@divegeester said
I’m saying that communities don’t raise children; the parents, grandparents, perhaps siblings and other family members do.

Any why can't the extended family be the definition now that was 'village' when the saying became a saying?

@torunn said
Close neighbourhoods can help contributing to the safety of the children - I grew up in such a small community. When my mother and father were at work, the other mothers mostly did the housework in their families and I was welcome to them for help or company. And if I did something wrong, I was told that too.

I agree that local communities influence children.

@yo-its-me said
Any why can't the extended family be the definition now that was 'village' when the saying became a saying?

Because a village is a community and a town is a community. An extended family isn’t a village nor a town.

@divegeester said
I agree that local communities influence children.

And I was very grateful for help when my children were disobedient - they would rather listen to other people than me.

@divegeester said
You’re a parent asking this?

Parents are obviously in the driving seat when it comes to raising their children, but they don't do so in isolation, but within the framework of the society in which they live. For example, a bad parent who encourages their child to smoke or take drugs would very quickly be visited by social services who would act in the child's best interest. - Even with good parents, the child will be nurtured by society as they grow, affecting their character and life choices.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
Parents are obviously in the driving seat when it comes to raising their children, but they don't do so in isolation, but within the framework of the society in which they live. For example, a bad parent who encourages their child to smoke or take drugs would very quickly be visited by social services who would act in the child's best interest. - Even with good parents, the child will be nurtured by society as they grow, affecting their character and life choices.

I agree that local communities influence children.

@torunn said
And I was very grateful for help when my children were disobedient - they would rather listen to other people than me.

It’s right for parents to be grateful for the influence of the local community when it has a positive influence on their offspring.

@divegeester said
I agree that local communities influence children.

And help raise them according to societal norms.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
If a pair of identical twins were separated at birth and grew up in profoundly different societies would their shared nature negate the separate nurture they experienced?

in various studies...personality was 50/50 ,IQ 75% genetic.

@badradger said
IQ 75% genetic.

That's interesting.
You don't have a link do you, I'd be interested in reading that

@divegeester said
Because a village is a community and a town is a community. An extended family isn’t a village nor a town.

Are we a village, here on this forum?