Christians/Muslims

Originally posted by divegeester
So you had in fact already left the church and just visited at weekend?

What has you speaking to the woman you were going to marry have to do with them not permitting the marriage?

I had not officially left the church but I was visiting them even though it became less frequently at the time. My wife had been part of the church for about 8 years before she also moved away. We became friends on Facebook and chatted on there. Initially the wedding was approved but when they found out we were talking to each other they cancelled the wedding, because it would apparently not bring honor to God's name.

Originally posted by Rajk999
Seriously, weak minded people ALLOW THESE THINGS TO HAPPEN TO THEM. They are needy, emotionally dependent, insecure people.

Well, he might argue, in his defence, that he was psychologically abused since birth. But he appears to be in denial about that.

Originally posted by Rajk999
So many stupid people in one family ... goodness me .. yet another record. You need to contact Guinness World Record people and see if you can secure a listing 😀

Seriously, weak minded people ALLOW THESE THINGS TO HAPPEN TO THEM. They are needy, emotionally dependent, insecure people. Somewhere in peoples teens they change into adults, they think like ...[text shortened]... ppen - and clearly it has not happened to 90% of your family - then they need professional help.

What exactly is it you think I allowed to happen?

Originally posted by FMF
Well, he might argue, in his defence, that he was psychologically abused since birth. But he appears to be in denial about that.

Even abused people wake up on day and say "ENOUGH !!" 🙂

Originally posted by Rajk999
Even abused people wake up on day and say "ENOUGH !!" 🙂

That is if they know they are being abused.

Originally posted by dj2becker
What exactly is it you think I allowed to happen?

Well I told you I was in a similar situation, although not as extreme as yours. The more extreme the views of the church the sooner I would react. I reacted in my late teens and gradually my parents saw that I was changing. They were not doing me anything, but I could smell trouble in my future if I stayed with that church. My faith in God never wavered. I left the church, not God. My parents did not speak to me for many months, but these things dont really bother me.

In your case you could have and should have had the foresight to see that you dont need to get a girlfiend, have them sideline you, then tell you not to talk to her, cancel wedding ... all that foolishness could have been seen afar off, because you know the kind of people they are.

A strong personality sees the trouble ahead and walks away from that early in his life. You were wavering back and forth. Maybe you were hoping to change them.

Originally posted by Rajk999
Well I told you I was in a similar situation, although not as extreme as yours. The more extreme the views of the church the sooner I would react. I reacted in my late teens and gradually my parents saw that I was changing. They were not doing me anything, but I could smell trouble in my future if I stayed with that church. My faith in God never wavered. I l ...[text shortened]... that early in his life. You were wavering back and forth. Maybe you were hoping to change them.

If you are born into an environment and you aren't exposed to much else you think that your situation is the norm.

Originally posted by dj2becker
That is if they know they are being abused.

And here you are, still denying that you were abused.

Originally posted by FMF
And here you are, still denying that you were abused.

Yep ... he is confused.

Originally posted by dj2becker
If you are born into an environment and you aren't exposed to much else you think that your situation is the norm.

From age 0 to 15, I would say that excuse is ok. After that its your fault that you choose not to be proactive. You could see these very same things happening to others. You could see for yourself, others in the church having problems You chose the path of least resistance ... the easy way out.

Originally posted by FMF
And here you are, still denying that you were abused.

Abused is a strong word. Maybe I just don't like playing the victim card.

Originally posted by dj2becker
I had not officially left the church but I was visiting them even though it became less frequently at the time. My wife had been part of the church for about 8 years before she also moved away. We became friends on Facebook and chatted on there. Initially the wedding was approved but when they found out we were talking to each other they cancelled the wedding, because it would apparently not bring honor to God's name.

When you say talking, do you mean having sex?

Originally posted by Rajk999
From age 0 to 15, I would say that excuse is ok. After that its your fault that you choose not to be proactive. You could see these very same things happening to others. You could see for yourself, others in the church having problems You chose the path of least resistance ... the easy way out.

From ages 0 to 15 I wasn't exposed to any other doctrine. When I got to uni I started visiting these forums. The rest is history.

Originally posted by divegeester
When you say talking, do you mean having sex?

No we never had intercourse before marriage. We lived 900 km apart. I did visit her a couple times though. And we did hold hands.

Originally posted by dj2becker
Abused is a strong word.

It's a technical term.